
Casablanca
Morocco
As-Salaam-Alaikum & Buckle Up! Welcome to Casablanca!
So, you've landed in Casablanca. You're humming "As Time Goes By," picturing Humphrey Bogart in a trench coat, and expecting mysterious alleyways dripping with romance? Bless your cinematic heart. Real Casablanca is more like a caffeinated seagull crashing a very loud, very aromatic, and absolutely fabulous party. It’s Morocco’s economic powerhouse, a sprawling city by the Atlantic, where sleek trams glide past donkeys pulling carts, and the call to prayer competes with car horns in a symphony of organised chaos. Ditch the fedora (seriously, you'll stick out), embrace the energy, and get ready for a city that’s less "play it again, Sam" and more "hold my mint tea, watch this!"
Fun Facts That Won't Win You Bar Trivia, But Are Cool Anyway
- Size Matters (Especially for Mosques): The Hassan II Mosque isn't just big; it's "hold-my-beer-while-I-build-this-on-the-ocean" big. Its minaret is the world's tallest, and the prayer hall can swallow 25,000 worshippers whole. Bonus: The roof opens! Because why pray indoors when you can have divine air conditioning?
- That Movie? Yeah, Not Filmed Here: The irony! The iconic 1942 film Casablanca was shot entirely on soundstages in Burbank, California. Rick’s Café? A Hollywood set. The entire cast? Never set foot in Morocco during filming. Casablanca itself only saw the movie... decades later. Talk about identity theft!
- Tram-tastic! Casablanca boasts Africa's first modern tramway system. It’s clean, efficient, cheap, and suspiciously on time (by Moroccan standards). Watching this sleek European import navigate the vibrant chaos is a sight in itself. Hop on for the best people-watching commute of your life.
Food Glorious Food: What to Shove in Your Face Immediately
Moroccan cuisine is a flavour bomb, and Casa does it justice. Skip the hotel buffet and dive in:
- Pastilla: Don't be fooled by its pigeon (or chicken) filling. This savory pie, wrapped in crispy, flaky warqa pastry, dusted with cinnamon and powdered sugar, is a mind-bendingly delicious sweet-and-savoury revelation. Think meaty baklava, but better.
- Fresh Seafood at the Port: Casa's a port city, baby! Head to the old medina port area for the day's catch grilled simply over charcoal. Sardines are legendary, but try whatever looks freshest. Squeeze lemon, eat with your hands, embrace the mess.
- Tagines, Obviously: The ubiquitous cone-lidded wonders. Lamb with prunes and almonds, chicken with preserved lemon and olives, or a hearty vegetable version. Slow-cooked goodness you scoop up with bread. Comfort food perfected.
- Street Snacks: Grab a bocadillo (crusty baguette stuffed with spicy tuna, sardines, or kefta meatballs), nibble on msemen (flaky, buttery flatbreads), and finish with chebakia (sesame-covered fried dough drenched in honey – sticky, sweet, and addictive).
The "Blink and You'll Miss It" 24-Hour Itinerary (Caffeine Required)
- Morning (8 AM - 12 PM):
- Hassan II Mosque: Start here. Be awestruck. Take the mandatory tour (non-Muslims only enter this way). Marvel at the craftsmanship, the ocean views, the sheer scale. Allow 1.5-2 hours.
- Corniche Stroll: Walk along the oceanfront Corniche. Breathe the salty air, watch surfers, scoff at the overpriced beach clubs, soak in the vibe.
- Lunch (12 PM - 1:30 PM): Seafood Lunch at the Port: Dive into the bustling port area near the old medina. Pick a simple grill joint crammed with locals. Point, order, feast.
- Afternoon (1:30 PM - 5 PM):
- Explore the Old Medina (Anfa): Not as labyrinthine as Fez, but still wonderfully chaotic. Haggle (gently!) for spices, leather, pottery. Get lost (safely). Find the Sqala Café (an old fortified bastion) for a mint tea with epic ocean views.
- Art Deco Architecture Walk (Mohammed V Square/Habous Quarter): Casa has stunning 1930s Art Deco gems. Wander around Mohammed V Square and the nearby streets, or head to the newer Habous Quarter (New Medina) for a more planned but charming "medina-lite" experience with great pastry shops.
- Evening (5 PM onwards):
- Rick's Café: Yes, it's a tourist trap based on a fictional bar from a movie not filmed here. Go anyway. It’s beautifully recreated, the piano bar vibe is fun, have a Casablanca beer or a cocktail. Embrace the kitsch! (Book ahead!).
- Dinner: Head back towards the Habbous Quarter for authentic, non-touristy restaurants, or find a bustling local spot near your accommodation for a hearty tagine.
- Skybar: If you fancy modern Casa, find a rooftop bar (Sky 28 at Kenzi Tower Hotel is classic) for expensive drinks and panoramic city views.
Expectation vs. Reality: The Hilarious Cold Shower
- Expectation: Mist-shrouded alleys, piano bars on every corner, everyone quoting Bogart, mysterious strangers in trench coats.
- Reality: Sunshine, traffic jams that defy physics, the overwhelming smell of fresh bread mixed with exhaust fumes, and exactly zero people spontaneously saying "Here's looking at you, kid." Instead, you'll get friendly "Bonjours," persistent but usually good-natured sales pitches, and the constant, comforting aroma of mint tea. The romance is there, but it’s the romance of everyday life lived loud and proud by the sea.
The Local’s Cheat Sheet: Don't Be That Tourist
- Transport: Petits Taxis (small, beige) are cheap and metered (INSIST on it!). Grands Taxis (large, Mercedes) are shared, fixed-route, and cheaper for longer distances. Tramway is your friend! Fast, clean, efficient. Walking is great in central areas, but distances are vast – comfy shoes are non-negotiable. Traffic is insane.
- Etiquette: Dress modestly (especially women – shoulders/knees covered is respectful). Haggling is expected in markets, but be polite and have fun with it, don't be aggressive. Always greet ("Bonjour" or "As-Salaam-Alaikum" + handshake) before launching into questions or transactions. Right hand only for eating and handing things. Tipping (Forfait) small change is appreciated for small services.
- Hidden(ish) Gems:
- Sacred Heart Cathedral: A stunning, abandoned Art Deco cathedral. Eerie and beautiful.
- Marché Central: Covered market bursting with fresh produce, seafood, spices, and flowers. Sensory overload in the best way.
- Villa des Arts: Contemporary art gallery housed in a beautiful Art Deco villa. A calm oasis.
- Surfing! Head to Ain Diab or further out for some surprisingly good Atlantic waves.
Conclusion: Casa, You Unexpected Beauty!
So, is Casablanca the romantic noir fantasy of the movies? Absolutely not. It’s better. It’s real. It’s vibrant, gritty, complex, delicious, loud, and utterly captivating in its own unique way. It’s a city that works hard, plays hard, prays hard, and drinks an astonishing amount of mint tea. Forget trying to find Rick; instead, get lost in the medina, get your hands dirty with grilled sardines, get awed by the mosque, and get swept up in the infectious energy of Morocco’s beating heart. Casablanca might not whisper sweet nothings, but it will grab you by the senses and shout "Welcome!" in a dozen different ways. Go. Explore. Embrace the chaos. You won't regret it (though your eardrums might).